I also liked letting the smoke form a nice thick white ball in my mouth, and then hungerly suck it in.
At about four in the morning I heard Jenn stirring around in the kitchen, so I went in to see if she had a good time. I asked her about her night and how it went. She said she had fun but was tired and needed to lie down. She said I must not be too sick anymore since I was up so late. I told her I was feeling better and was eager to show her how good I could smoke now. She said I could show her later, and maybe she would teach me a few new things. I said that would be great and told her goodnight.

The next day Jenn took me out on our second story deck and let me show her all I had learned. She really seemed impressed, and told me that I seemed like a natural smoker.
She said I smoked with a very sensuous and seductive style. I asked her if girls really got turned on by the way a man smoked. She replied that some probably do , but the ones that really like it are the men. I told her I was'nt interrested in turning men on only women.
With the way you smoke and the way you look the only heads you'll be tuning are the boys, except for a few dykes that is.
I asked her what she meant by the way I looked. Look Phillip you just have to accept the fact that you were supposed to be a girl. I just listened to her talk as I kept smoking my long white cigarette. Look at you I'm three inches taller than you and probally weigh more too. You have all the features of a girl, high cheekbones , delicate features, tiny feet and hands. Even your hair looks like a girl. I mean it's almost touching you shoulders for petes sake. I said I thought girls liked guys with long hair? Yea but not styled like that. I said your the one who cut it remember? Well I just thought it would look cute like that. It frames your face so nicely.
Well I was just blown away, I knew I was small and kind of feminine but all this was news to me. She said the sooner I accepted my fate I would be alot happier. " And what fate is that to be some big goons main squeeze"?
"If your lucky" she said.
Well that was it I crushed out my cigarette and stormed out.
Jenn was calling out for me to stop but I did'nt listen. I got in my car and drove to the beach to cool off and think about all she had just said.
Once I started driving I realised I did'nt bring any cigarettes with me. They were Jenn's anyway. So I stopped off by the store to get some.
I went up to the counter and asked for a pack of Virginia Slims 120's.Thats when it hit me what I had just done. I just orderd a pack of girl cigarettes. But it was to late the little old chinese lady had already heard me.
She said I need to see some I.D. young lady.
I reached in my pocket for my wallet when I realised she had just called me young lady.
Damn I had stormed off without my licsence. I had to have a cigarette right now. I guess I was having my first official nic fit. I told her I left it at the house. She just stared at me for a few moments, and then stated she would sell them to me this one time without I.D. because she could see I was really upset. I told her thank you very much!
As she was getting the cigs, she asked me what was the matter had I just gotten in a fight with my boyfriend or something? I really did'nt want to get in to it with her so I just said yea something like that.
She said well you show him who's boss sweety as she handed me the smokes. I put the money on the counter and realised I did'nt have a lighter. Could I get a lighter from you too I asked? Sure hon here you go it's on the house you look like you've been through enough today. I thanked the lady and left with my cigarettes.
When I got in the car I desprately tore off the foil wrapper and pulled out one of the long white cigs.As I placed it between my lips I noticed she had givin me a pink lighter with the words GIRLS RULE on it. I almost laughed out load, was I the only one who was still sane in this world?
Or was I the crazy one?
I ignited my new Girls Rule lighter and took in my much needed first drag.No fancy stuff here just a good ol fasioned cheek hollower. I needed that smoke deep in my lungs.
I started up the car and proceeded to drive to the beach. As I was driving I held the cigarette in my left hand so the smoke could drift out the window. I had seen Jenn do it this way so many times, it just came natural.
I did notice though, that holding it that way with my two fingers straight out did make my hands look awfully feminine. Right now I did'nt care though. I want'ed to smoke these VS 120's, they were good.
I got to the beach and decided to just go for a little walk, and clear my thoughts.I took my cigarettes with me I did'nt want to have another nic fit.
After I had walked for awhile I found a nice shady spot to sit and have a smoke.
I took a cig out of the pack and brought it to my lips. I lit it and took a deep drag. It felt like I had been smoking all my life. I seemed to feel alot more confidant and self assured about my self when I had a cigarette between my fingers. I guess it was all the praise I had received the night before. But what ever the reason I liked myself as a smoker.
I decided then that I would become a full time smoker. And I would be the best smoker I could be. If Jenn thought that I smoked like a girl fine. I would smoke like a girl. And I would continue to smoke my effeminate VS 120's, I did'nt care what anybody eles thought.
Maybe Jenn was right, maybe I would be better off a girl. Maybe I could find a nice attractive lesbian who whould like me and my feminine cigarettes. Who knows , Like Jenn says how do you know you don't like it unless you try it.